Leaders: We Must Fully Own Our Stories Around Racism and Privilege
In all honesty I wanted to title this blog post using the four-letter “S” word. “Stories” is an accurate term and my small effort in elevating the quality of conversation. But, I was tempted; emotions are powerful.
I have spent the last week reflecting on the death of George Floyd. I was hesitant to immediately add my thoughts to the public discourse. This is such an important moment; it feels like one of those moments that fundamentally shifts our perspectives and awareness. I notice this shift in my white identifying friends who previously were hesitant to accept the reality of white privilege. It feels like we are having a collective “Ah ha” experience.
As a hetrosexual, white identifying woman, I work hard to be aware of my own biases and blindspots. I am fortunate to have been exposed to and part of efforts to improve diversity, equity and inclusion in both my professional and personal life. But, as part of owning my story, I have not done enough. As this week has taught us, we all must be more active allies.
What stops us from owning our stories? Of being fully aware of our subconscious and conscious biases? Often it is shame. It doesn't feel good to admit that I have biases. We don’t want to believe that about ourselves. Having the biases doesn't make us bad people, but we have a responsibility, particularly as leaders, to own up to them. That is the first step.
What can we do to own our stories and be more active allies for diversity, equity and inclusion?
Listen, listen, listen with an open heart and mind. Notice feelings of defensiveness and shame come up as you listen to another person’s story. Fully acknowledge the feelings, take a deep breath and re-engage as a listener.
When we ask questions, ground them in curiosity.
Don’t place the burden on black and brown people to educate us; we need to take responsiblity for our own learning. Read a book, attend a talk, watch a documentary.
Find the courage to speak up when we witness acts of injustice.
I have recently joined a book discussion group in which we will be discussing Me and White Supremacy: Combat Racism, Change the World, and Become a Good Ancestor by Layla F. Saad. It is a small step, but something I can do right now. What can you do now?